Hello No readers,
It’s been 527 days since I last wrote you, and what a 527 days they have been. Back in May 2019, we were consumed with questions like Can you improve upon Ranch? Today we know with certainty that you cannot. Also there’s a pandemic.
Fortunately (?), the No is undeterred. Here is some vintage No I gathered back in May for a newsletter I was too overcome with ennui to send:
Are consumers ready for a toilet equipped with Alexa?
Are female urinals the answer to queues at the loos?
Will coronavirus change 'Real Housewives' forever?
Should ‘Harry Potter’ be included in the canon of Holocaust literature?
Who on earth approved this Nicki Minaj wax figure?
God we were young then.
Weird TikTok trend has men dipping their testicles in soy sauce to ‘taste it’
Behold! These inflatable trousers have that wow factor
Meet the trikini, beach fashion’s answer to coronavirus
Quarantining with a ghost? It’s scary
But today, we are fine. Totally fine.
I am the fly on Mike Pence’s head
No, I am the fly on Mike Pence’s head—this is why I did it
No, I am the fly on Mike Pence’s head. Here’s why I’m supporting Trump
We’re all dealing with the same struggles.
Dwayne Johnson rips off front gate with his bare hands to get to work
Why we don't like our underground house
Yes, my twin sister is hotter than me
And eating and drinking our feelings.
Arby’s wants to sell ‘The Meats’ by the pound
Cracker Barrel is adding alcohol to its menu for the first time
Pepsi is launching a drink to aid sleep
Taco Bell is now selling its own custom wine
Red Lobster is serving Mountain Dew margaritas
Reese’s is putting pretzels in peanut butter cups
Reese’s is maybe putting potato chips in peanut butter cups
The secret to the best tomato sauce of your life? Add prosecco
Stay safe out there. I promise to return in fewer than 527 days. In the meantime, if you spot any No in the wild, send it my way.
❌❌❌,
Kira